Kiteretsu, Fun, India

Try giving Indians rules. They'll either proceed entirely by instinct, ignoring the rules completely, or they won't follow them at all.

I'm no exception. When asked to write this piece, I nearly succumbed to the temptation to deliver a photo collage instead of text. I believe it would be the best way to vividly convey India as it is today. If not everything, at least fragments of India could be conveyed.

Beyond that, I can't imagine any other way to explain the bizarre and extraordinary events unfolding across this vast country at this very moment. So, I want to tell you what I saw, using words instead of pictures.

If you wish to have any connection with India, you must urgently expand your knowledge of cricket. Two teams of eleven players compete, while the remaining 1.1 billion Indians are utterly engrossed in watching.

If you want to make friends in India, just criticize politicians. That will make everything work out.

Two men walking hand in hand aren't gay. They're just good friends.

Calling a man "brother" in North India shows respect. Do the same in Mumbai, West India, and you might get into a bit of trouble. Don't ask me why. It involves complicated employment issues between states.

Step out onto the road, and you'll witness jaw-dropping sights. The ultimate example is Delhi's drivers. Take any city's racetrack. Put those drivers up against F1 racer Schumacher. If I were betting, I'd put every penny I had on Delhi's drivers without hesitation.

You might encounter such delightful scenes. Men speeding on motorcycles with two riders. The third passenger isn't human—it's a monkey = photo. The animals lined up from left to right are a visual illustration of evolution itself.

You might find a billionaire one moment, then encounter wild animals on the road the next. There are ascetic monks smoking cannabis, and a 90-year-old man who drinks camel milk to stay virile and recently became a father for the 22nd time.
Discoveries like these and more await you in India, a strangely delightful and amusing country.

(Supervised by: Dentsu Inc. Aegis Network Business Bureau)